- Special Sections
By JIM SCHINDLER
If you were never naughty, you never had much fun.
We See You
Never do brain surgery with your index finger, while you’re driving. We can still see you!
Jim was attending a University of St. Francis’ football gamewith his friends Tom and Margie. At halftime, he decided to go get something to eat. On returning to his seat, Jim started to wolf down his chili dogs, like a starving man at an all-you-can-eat buffet. As a result, chili sauce began to dribble on his tie. (Don’t you dare think it was me; I don’t wear a tie.) Anyway, Margie noticed and said, “Jim, you’re getting chili sauce all over your tie.”
“That’s okay,” Jim replied, “When I get home, I’ll put it in the freezer and have it for lunch tomorrow!”
Love & Alcohol
Alcohol increases the desire, but ruins the performance.